NeverFap Deluxe Summary
#need a link to all the website content, instead?
Here’s a basic summary of NeverFap Deluxe!
For a much more in-depth overview of NeverFap Deluxe there really is no substitute to reading the NeverFap Deluxe Homepage. It’s written a bit like a visual novel too, so it’s significantly more engaging!
With that said, this summary is also pretty neat, and I know a lot of people appreciate it as a refresher to all the basic concepts of NeverFap Deluxe.
Otherwise, you may also benefit from the 7 Day NeverFap Deluxe Kickstarter which covers a lot of the high-level concepts of NeverFap Deluxe in a very broad way.
Check out my Patreon for updates on NeverFap Deluxe!
Welcome to the NeverFap Deluxe Summary.
If I had to fundamentally describe what we’re trying to achieve here with NeverFap Deluxe, one particular word comes to mind.
In fact, everything on this website is designed to help you achieve balance in some way, and for good reason.
Balance makes overcoming your porn addiction trivial.
When you have balance you no longer experience urges, you no longer doubt yourself and most of all, you gain the power and freedom to live your life however you want.
I don’t care about your moral arguments. I don’t even really care whether you think porn is good or bad or not.
The only thing I care about is process, because I’m a master of process and that’s why you’re here on my website.
So the process I’m about to share with you is designed to help you achieve balance in life, which will help you regain control over your mind so you can easily overcome your porn addiction.
Now in order to achieve this balance, porn addiction recovery actually comes down to one very simple idea.
Replacing Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms with Healthy Coping Mechanisms.
Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms include things like watching porn and being judgemental/self-critical, while Healthy Coping Mechanisms include things like remaining calm and practicing meditation.
There is no alternative to this process.
There are no “cheap hacks” to suddenly make you stop being addicted to porn, where you suddenly have this “moment of awareness” where all your bad habits dissolve away and your life returns to normal.
Instead, it is a hard process of learning to replace negative habits with positive ones, and that’s really all there is to it.
Now, the reason why you’ve most likely been struggling to overcome your porn addiction for so long, is because chances are you’ve been going about this process in an unproductive way.
For example, you may have been attempting to distract yourself via youtube videos, cold showers, exercise etc. as a way to address your uncomfortable feelings, urges and emotions.
When instead you should have been learning to consciously engage and be present with your feelings and emotions.
What a lot of people don’t realise is that distraction is in fact one of the many Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms we practice on a daily basis which actually sabotages our ability to remain present with ourselves.
And this is why education and awareness play such an important part of the porn addiction recovery process, so we can truly understand the effect our behaviours and actions have on the outcomes we experience on a daily basis.
In fact, you may never have attempted to replace those Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms in any meaningful or healthy way.
In a way that has empowered you to approach your emotions and feelings without fear, prejudice, irrationality or anxiety.
Instead, hoping those aspects of your personality would somehow wither away on their own, which unfortunately is one of the primary reasons why people remain addicted to porn for so long.
Only by consciously addressing our mental health in a meaningful way can we hope to achieve positive change in our habits and behaviours.
Now, the reason why Healthy Coping Mechanisms work is quite simple.
Healthy Coping Mechanisms work because they help you develop control over your mind.
Control which allows you to dictate every single aspect of how you think, feel and behave, as you have been designed to do as a modern human being.
To come back to our previous example, distraction is an Unhealthy Coping Mechanism because it doesn’t help us develop control over our minds.
Instead, it does the exact opposite of that. Distraction merely puts our emotions and feelings aside, without truly addressing them in a conscious, nor meaningful way.
Furthermore, I would like to add that learning to develop control over our minds is a completely reasonable goal which everyone is capable of.
Certainly, from the perspective of your porn addiction, it can help to think of your self-destructive behaviours and Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms as a learning difficulty.
Which is to say that there’s nothing inherently wrong with you.
You simply haven’t been taught how to think and feel in constructive way that has made sense to you, possibly for a very long time since childhood.
Well, Healthy Coping Mechanisms are going to be the sole means through which we will learn to develop that control, arguably because there are no other sustainable alternatives.
For example, you’d be hard pressed to convince me that binging on junk food or expressing constant anger is ever going to be a sustainable method towards dealing with your emotions.
As opposed to something like meditation which doesn’t affect your physical health negatively, and which only has a positive net-benefit mentally.
So what does it mean to have developed control over your mind?
Essentially, it means being able to consciously direct your mind however you like 100% of the time.
Rather than have your subconscious behaviours, habits and desires dictate your outcomes in life.
And this really is key to understanding why you may have been struggling with your porn addiction for so long.
Many Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms are merely learnt behaviours and responses which can be tracked back to childhood.
Picked up (and possibly even taught) from family and friends, simply because no one knew any better.
Well, the good news is that just as those behaviours have been developed, they can also be replaced and relearnt with Healthy Coping Mechanisms instead, especially now that you’re conscious of them.
Now there are three broad categories of Healthy Coping Mechanism which contribute towards achieving balance in life.
Awareness, Calmness and Ambition.
If you have all three of these areas in your life under control then you will be in balance and you won’t struggle with urges, doubt or any potential self-limiting beliefs you may have.
Most people however struggle with at least one or two of these categories, and those areas will be your key focus during your recovery.
In addition, the only way to develop these Healthy Coping Mechanisms is through practice and consistency. Which is to say that they are the only two things which matter to your recovery from a process point of view.
And of course, the easiest way to develop both Calmness and Awareness is through meditation.
For most people, this essentially comes down to 10 minutes of meditation each day, and this will be enough for most people to help them develop control over their minds.
It’s personally what I do everyday, and it’s what helps me maintain balance.
Of course, you may struggle primarily with Ambition as well. I don’t know you well enough to say for certain, although I’m happy to provide you with personalised advice via our #NewNeverFapper initiative.
…aaaaand that’s NeverFap Deluxe in a nutshell.