So, you find yourself in a desperate panic and all you can think about is nutting a big one out?
Well, the response should always be the same, regardless of whether you’re intensely craving porn, sitting at home in a calm state, or even completing an intense workout.
As the guide states, calmness is a core tennant of the NeverFap Deluxe Method, which is to say that your job is to always remain calm and relaxed no matter what you’re doing.
If you’re always relaxed and in-touch with your emotions, then there is no possible way that you can even begin to experience cravings at all.
And the reason why you’re experiencing those cravings to begin with is because you’ve lost balance in some way i.e. you lost your cool.
Put simply, there are no opportunities to experience cravings when you are relaxed.
A key thing to understand about cravings is that they don’t just happen all of a sudden, inspite of the fact that it may often feel like this is the case.
In truth, the path towards developing those cravings were set many hours ago without you consciously realising it.
And that’s why I place such a heavy emphasis on developing awareness, because it’s one of the most effective methods we have in regards to preventing ourselves from losing balance, so that we can identify these behaviours ahead of time and prevent them from taking place.
Often it can be an incredibly small decision you made hours ago, which can have serious knock-on effects later down the track.
For example, maybe you decided it would be okay to stay up late to pursue your work or hobbies, only to find yourself in a situation where you’re now tired and have no control over your emotions.
Sometimes it’s just a priority thing. Maybe you thought it would be okay to spend just ten minutes more playing video games, only to find yourself stressed out trying to catch up with all your chores.
There are many different ways we can lose balance, much of it (in most cases) largely obvious to you.
Like, I’m sure you’re more than aware that staying up late affects your emotions, or that binge eating affects your energy levels.
Well, I’m asking you to take it a step further.
I’m asking you to consciously act on this knowledge and stop yourself from making these reckless decisions.
Because I’m here to tell you that there is no other alternative.
In fact, when it comes down to it, this is all the NeverFap Deluxe Method really is. Replacing Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms with Healthy Coping Mechanisms so that you can achieve balance in life.
A key misunderstanding a lot of people have with awareness is that it somehow gives you “super powers”.
Like, you just practice your 10 minutes of meditation each day, and that suddenly makes you immune from everything.
Absolutely incorrect.
Instead, awareness is a tool that is designed to help you make it easier for you to do the hard (but right) thing, of consciously changing your thoughts and behaviours.
There is no “easy way” or “cheap hack” to overcome porn addiction.
At the end of the day, it fundamentally comes down to replacing Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms (such as watching porn) with Healthy Coping Mechanisms (meditation).
With Healthy Coping Mechanisms you can have the most perfect two weeks of feeling as if you’re completely invulnerable to the influence of porn.
Only to breakdown into a puddle of mud the moment your mind decides to do a complete 180 and taunt you with your cravings for it.
If you don’t replace the habits, nothing will change.
Like most things in life, there's good news and there's bad news.
The bad news is that once you’ve experienced an episode, there’s very little you can do, because at that point you’ve already lost balance and you’re truly on your own at that point.
Especially if you haven’t yet developed the skills to calm down and not take your emotions personally.
The good news is that there are a million ways we can learn not to lose balance, which means we can prevent ourselves from having those episodes at all.
And this is arguably a much more effective strategy than trying to deal with our problems in a reactive way.
With proper practice and by meditating daily, we can utterly crush this thing and leave your addiction in the dust.
Please check out the Practices section to learn more.
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You should totally be my first <3