People seem to be interested in what The Reade© is up to, so I thought I might share my meditation routine with people.
Essentially, I’m the kind of person who likes to keep things as simple as possible.
I meditate 10 minutes before bed each night, and that's really all there is to it.
Furthermore, that’s all we really need.
People seem to overcomplicate this whole idea of meditation as this “hardcore” practice which must be treated as conscisely as scripture.
As if we should be meditating 40 minutes each day under perfect circumstances, otherwise we risk derailing and losing all our hard work.
Not only does this kind of pressure stress people out, however it’s also counter-intuitive to what NeverFap Deluxe is trying to promote, which is calmness and simplicity at a fundamental level.
I suppose it’s a bit like when you’re getting ready to go for a big night out on the town, and you end up spending 2 hours cycling through clothes and hairstyles because you can’t quite figure out which look to go for.
That’s the exact opposite of what meditation should be.
It should be as casual as popping on sandals to walk down to the local shops, to grab a bottle of milk.
One piece of key advice I’d provide newcomers with is.
Treat meditation no different to eating or brushing your teeth.
It’s nothing special. It’s nothing extraordinary. There’s no reason to freak out or worry.
All we are doing is continuing our basic human maintenance, so we can continue the rest of our day struggle-free.
And when you stick to this basic routine, everything falls into place and it won’t even become something you’ll need to think about.
You’ll simply recognise that it’s that time of the day to meditate again, you’ll do your ten minutes, and then you’ll continue on with your day.
Of course, the idea behind meditation is to help us remain calm, as well as remind us remind us of this idea of balance which is so central to the porn addiction recovery process.
That’s why I find it useful to also practice meditation/mindfulness whenever I have a moment to spare, usually at routine times during the day.
For example, I will usually meditate as I walk to the train station on the way to work in the morning, or while waiting for the train to arrive.
These situations are excellent opportunities to meditate, because they provide plenty of different cues to for us to observe and notice.
Not to mention, because these moments are scattered throughout the day, they help you more easily align yourself and remain balanced, so that it becomes more difficult to become stressed throughout the day.
Let us understand that the recovery process isn’t about reacting to our emotions and putting out fires when we see them. It’s about following best practice so we don’t have to put out fires at all.
Of course, what's important is finding a routine that works well for you.
Everyone has a different routine and schedule, and your meditation routine should reflect that. I know some get more out of meditation when they practice it in the morning, rather than at night.
Personally speaking, I like to do my 10 minutes of meditation at night before bed, because that’s also when I write my accountability post and is also what helps me relax and sleep better at night.
And definitely, I would recommend spacing out your meditation sessions rather than do them in huge chunks, if you do decide that you are going to spend a significant amount of time meditating.
In the context of overcoming porn addiction, meditation isn’t like physical exercise where the longer you practice, the more you gain from it.
Instead, it can help to think of balance as a state of mind that you cultivate, that can merely take seconds to arrive at.
The only reason you’re meditating is to remind yourself that state of mind exists, so you can easily access it throughout your day.
Ultimately, meditation is a practice which is designed to help you maintain balance over your mind throughout the day, no different to how drinking water throughout the day keeps you hydrated.
It is a tool to help ground you back to your present senses, and doing this frequently throughout the day is going to be more useful than doing it all in one long sitting.
Regardless, always keep it simple.
If you keep it simple and you stick to your routine, you’ll already be well-ahead than most.